When Job Searching Feels Tough

This post is written by Shabana Ansari, Senior Policy Analyst, Employment and Social Development Canada (ESDC)

The problem: Looking for a new job can trigger stress, uncertainty, and emotional highs and lows, especially when progress is slow or unpredictable. These cycles can leave us feeling discouraged, isolated, or unsure about next steps.

Why it matters: The emotional strain of job searching can affect motivation, and overall wellbeing. Recognizing these challenges helps us navigate the process more realistically and with greater self compassion.

The solution: Adopting healthy strategies can make the process more manageable and help maintain resilience, perspective, and momentum until the right opportunity comes along.

(Note: As a non-disabled, neurotypical person, I acknowledge that the approach outlined in the article may not resonate with everyone, especially those who may be disabled, neurodivergent, have intersecting identities, or are living with issues I know nothing about.)

Looking for a new job can be a daunting experience or an exciting one, depending on who you ask.

For some it can be a time full of possibility and anticipation about what’s next. For others, it can bring a lot of unease and anxiety, especially if they have been affected by organizational restructuring or layoffs.

No matter what our situation, job searching still requires a lot of time, effort, and patience. And emotional upheaval is a natural part of the process, which is often compounded by the uncertainty around our future career and livelihood. For example, we may walk out of an interview feeling unsure of how we performed, then later feel relieved to learn we’ve advanced to the next round. Or we may be thrilled to hear we’re a top candidate for a role, only to be disappointed when the position goes to someone else.

The good news though is that there are ways to manage these highs and lows more effectively. Here are some strategies I've used in the past with varying degrees of success:

Knowing what to expect

When I was seeking opportunities in a new sector after having spent more than a decade in another, my calendar was suddenly full of networking events, meetings, and interviews. I was getting updates and responses to my emails which made me feel optimistic and energized. However, very soon there was nothing but silence which left me feeling confused and frustrated.

But knowing that these cycles are normal made a big difference to my outlook. When things slowed down, I reminded myself that this was just the way things are instead of assuming something was wrong. This mindset helped me avoid taking the lull personally and made it easier for me to keep moving forward.

Feeling all the feelings

Suppressing my feelings never works for me. On the rare occasions when I push away my emotions, I feel a sense of increased restlessness and anxiety.

During a particularly frustrating search for a promotional role, I let myself feel every feeling without labeling anything as negative or positive, or trying to “fix” my mood. It helped me not only move through my emotions more constructively but also made me feel calmer afterwards.

Seeking support intentionally

Having someone to talk to during a job search is a blessing. A friend, a family member, or a mentor can provide emotional support when we need it the most.

When I was new to a country where I didn't have a professional or social network, I turned to fellow jobseekers on online forums to feel less alone and exchange news and information.

Having someone who understands what we’re going through reduces feelings of isolation, creates a sense of community, and offers practical support that helps us keep moving forward.

Doing things that energize me

I am intentional about making room in my day for activities that boost my energy and mood - sometimes it's taking a brisk walk, listening to my favourite songs, or spending time on things I enjoy like reading, painting or chatting with friends.

My energy shows up in how I interact with others. Physical activity, in particular, improves my mood, sharpens my thinking, and increases motivation. I feel stronger in body and mind, more confident about my prospects, and more in control – all the qualities that I hope show up in my interactions with recruiters and hiring managers.

Keeping things in perspective

When things don’t move as quickly as we’d like, it’s easy to feel discouraged or powerless. Maybe a contact hasn’t made an introduction yet, or a hiring manager hasn’t followed up when they said they would. While it’s fine to send a polite reminder, it also helps to step back and view these situations through a wider lens. This helps not take everything personally and reduces unnecessary frustration.

A friend was talking to me recently about having lost a role due to restructuring within her organization about a decade ago.

“I was discouraged and created a cycle of negative thinking that left me feeling stuck. I eventually landed my dream job and when I think about it now, I wonder why I put so much energy into feeling miserable then.”

My friend’s experience is a great example of how a shift in perspective can help us see the situation as temporary rather than defining.

A few last words

I realize that using the strategies outlined above won’t eliminate the toll that job searching can have on our bodies and minds. But I hope they make the ride more manageable, helping us stay motivated, and productive until we reach the other side.

Good luck to us!